Looking back on the past 25 years..

I laughed and I cried,

I tasted heaven and I saw hell,

I lived fully and sometimes I plunged into darkness,

I was surrounded at times and felt lonely at others,

I was torn to pieces and I was restored to wholeness numerous times,

I was ecstatically happy and I was equally devastated,

I fell in love a few times and was loved in return,

I broke a few hearts and was heartbroken a few times,

I hurt some and I was hurt,

I lost some friends and gained some,

I made mistakes and surely will make some more,

I let go of the past and all expectations for the future,

I traveled the world, moved to three different hubs and settled in New York,

I struggled with my identity and consider myself a child of the world,

I started smoking, quit smoking and I’ve started again (Repeat x5),

I lost myself for a while only to find myself again as a totally different person.

I lost faith in God and then gained it again, only stronger this time.

I tried all religions and picked none, I found refuge in spirituality.

I decided to embrace the philosophy of Yoga: To be good and do good.

I learned that if you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will.

I learned that our attitude toward life will determine life’s attitude towards us.

I learned that the only thing that matters in life is life itself,

I learned to stop judging others and mostly myself,

I learned that courage is not the absence of fear,

I learned to stop seeking approval of others; I am that I am.

I learned that I am everything and I am nothing at the same time,

I learned to differentiate between loneliness and solitude,

I learned that a life isn’t worth living without feeling love and compassion,

I learned to give full heartedly and to never expect anything in return,

I learned to let go of all grudges; people deserve a second chance.

I learned to save the drama for the screen and that nothing is worth it,

I learned that forgiving is a gift. I forgave others and mostly, I forgave myself.

On this special day, I’d like to take the time to spread words of gratitude.

I want to thank my parents for just being, you are my role models.

I want to thank my family for existing, without you I would be nothing.

I want to thank my friends for filling my heart with love, without you I’d be lost.

I want to thank the people who loved me for teaching me so many lessons.

I want to thank the people who harmed me, for you have been great teachers too.

I want to thank everyone who ever dried my tears for lifting me up.

I want to thank the people who made me cry for making me stronger.

I want to thank God, as I understand him, for all his teaching, for the ups and downs and for everything I have.

Mostly, I’d like to thank my grandmother. I am blessed to have known an angel for a quarter of a century. She was my mentor, my guide, my heart and soul. It pains me that she isn’t here today and the thought of not blowing the candles on the cake she would have baked for me paralyses me. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get over her death or the fact that I never got to say goodbye. I still wake up in the morning with a pinch in my heart and probably will until the rest of my life. For what it’s worth, I loved her to the bone and hold on only to the sweet tender memories we shared. In fact, there was never a sour moment. I vow to lead an honorable life in your name my love and to make you proud. This I promise you.

My only wish this year is dedicated to my loved ones. I wish you a life full of love, happiness & peace and pray for your wellbeing. I am blessed to have you all in my life. For real, I love you.

Eternal Love and Light to you all. Namaste.

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